You may have read/ heard me talk about the “give-a-crap factor” in my emails and videos.
The give-a-crap factor is when you care so much that you feel a sense of urgency; you can’t stop yourself from taking action because bad things happen if you let it go.
Your give-a-crap factor might make you seem a little edgy, tense or even grumpy. And heck – who wouldn’t be a little off? You see that something bad is bound to happen and you can’t stop it from happening. That would make anyone edgy, tense, or grumpy. How can something coming from such a good place come across so negatively? The juxtaposed positive intent with negative outcomes is a painful irony.
I have been thinking about this give-a-crap factor concept because when it is not managed, it has an even deeper impact – more than coming across a bit negatively.
When you recognize that something bad is about to happen, and your involvement would only make the situation explosive, you have to disengage. For many of the clients I coach, they describe divorcing from the situation. They turtle, protect themselves and try to blind themselves from seeing the bad stuff happening.
What concerns me most about these patterns of behavior is that this turtling, these strategies to self-preserve, result in closing the doors to vulnerability.
Vulnerability is often a catalyst for change, a motivator for the other party to be more open, and to slow down and see the situation from a different angle. You’re reading this right – vulnerability can often help the other person give-a-crap about what you give-a-crap about. And in turn (you guessed it, I’m going to get repetitive here!), you might give-a-crap about their perspective, too.
Emotional intelligence is broken down into these four broad categories:
Social awareness
Self-awareness
Relationship management
Self-management
Emotional intelligence is something that we can all grow. I would love to support your growth in this area so that you can better manager your give-a-crap factor. When we manage your give-a-crap factor, our stress reduces, we end up achieving more of our outcomes and relationships improve.
Set up a time to chat through this link with me to see how I can help reduce your stress, achieve more and improve your relationships.
Kerri